


Doppelganger

by ArtisticallyInsightful1



Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Accidental Cheating, Ace L, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Light Is Not Kira, Angst with a Happy Ending, Asexual Character, Asexuality, Asexuality Spectrum, B is a messy bitch, BB is a dick, Beyond Birthday Being Creepy, Beyond Birthday is his own warning, Beyond Birthday is just lonely, Beyond birthday is no longer an aggressive top LOL, Cheating, Detectives, Doppelganger, Everyone Is Gay, Fighting, He gone steal yo man, Insecure L, Jealous Beyond Birthday, Jealous L, Jealousy, L doesn't give a single fuck, L has no time for bullshit, L is a living calculator, L is asexual, L vs BB, Light is prideful, Light is too proud to admit when he is wrong, Light wants to die from embarrassment, M/M, Married Characters, Married Couple, Married Life, Matt is shook, Mello and Matt are married, Mello is amused, Mello wants to film it and laugh, Rape, Rape/Non-con Elements, fake date, tinder is not nice to him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-04
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2019-07-06 18:38:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15891756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArtisticallyInsightful1/pseuds/ArtisticallyInsightful1
Summary: Light is taken aback by his husband's strange behavior. His husband has a very low libido but suddenly he wants nothing more than to make love. Little does Light know that his husband L has a doppelganger. Warnings: AU, B is a freak, PWP in the beginning, L is a living calculator and L beat's B's ass with grace and class. Of course, because it is not like him to be too crass.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> L is asexual but he enjoys sex. Just very rarely. He and Light have been married for a few years in this fic. I came up with this silly story while traveling and rushed to write it down. It's not canon based at all and it's on the silly side but it is not a crackfic. Most of my stories tend to be on that borderline between crack and serious. I really like this one honestly. I love how kick ass and authoritative L is. He takes no one's shit and he truly does love his husband. He's just a little insecure when it comes to sex because in this society sex is everywhere but he can't relate to society's obsession with sex so he feels like an outsider, even within his own marriage :(

Light was perplexed. Shell-shocked. Shaken to his core. L had him pressed against the wall of an empty auditorium kissing him furiously. Light was confused as to why his husband would tell him to meet him in an auditorium of all places but figured he wanted to do new and kinky. The huge room was empty except for the two of them rutting like animals against a podium. Light was enjoying the change in pace. L never kissed like this. Ever! L hardly ever showed any interest in sex. Light was trying to figure out if there was a special occasion that he forgot. L's tongue was roaming almost curiously around his mouth. Every so often L would suck on his tongue.

Well, that was new.

What was also baffling and new was how vocal L was being. He moaned and gripped at Light as if he was a starving man on the brink of death and Light was the only man that could satiate him. It did wonders for his ego.

Light couldn't rid himself of the thought that something was wrong. L was too touchy-feely and needy today. His voice was the same baritone but his breath hitched at every caress Light gave him. L tilted his head back exposing his neck he moaned Light's name in a sensual and drawn out way and Light had never felt so hard in his life. Light felt that he could just burst. He sunk his teeth into L's neck sucking and licking at the now sensitive flesh.

L was literally shuddering''Light...I need you...''

''What's gotten into you baby?'' Light asks breathlessly.

''Nothing. That's the problem.'' L deadpanned.

Light growled and pushed L onto a nearby desk. Light guess that it was a stage prop. He didn't give a damn all he wanted was to fuck his husband senseless. Weird acting or no. To Light's surprise L was already prepped and ready to go. Light let out a deep grunt his brows furrowing as he looked down at L's glistening cock and felt at his wet loosened hole,''I see you were having fun without me earlier...''

''Only because I couldn't wait...I need you now!'' L said demanding. Light flinched slightly not used to hearing his husband raise his voice unless he was deadly serious. Light fumbled for a condom.

L quirked a non-existent brow,''What are you looking for?''

''A condom. I know how meticulous you are when it comes to sex.'' Light answers pulling out the condom. L knocked it from his hand,''I want to feel you inside of me...All of you...I want to enjoy the sensation of you cuming inside of me.''

Light let out a shuddering breath before slamming in without warning.

L let out a curt scream at the sudden intrusion. Light thrust painfully slow and kissed L's cheek,''Sorry baby, you just got me so fucking excited. I love hearing you talk like that...''

L moaned,''Go faster!''

Light obliged fucking into the other man ruthlessly. L's moans sounded like sobs and they went straight to Light's cock and overinflated ego,''Oh fuck yeah...scream for me.''

L did just that and Light's eyes rolled backward,''So obedient today!''

L chuckles darkly. Light cut the chuckles short by striking a very sensitive spot inside of the other. L was practically whining as Light brutally assaulted his prostate.

Whining.

Sure Light was used to his husband doing his deadpanned and sarcastic whine but not this. This was something completely different and it was driving Light wild. Without thinking, Light pressed his hand against L's throat. L's eyes widened and he looked up at Light frightened. Light squeezed down on the other man's throat never ceasing his frantic thrusts.

L huffed and squirmed under him.

Light hissed,''Beg for your release...''

''Please...''L choked out a few tears leaving his dazed eyes. Light rammed into the other man unrelenting. The desk creaking loudly beneath them. L reached a hand between them and jerked himself to the pace of Light's thrusting,''Please let me cum Light-kun...''

The helplessness of L's voice broke something inside of Light. All inhibitions flew out of the window as thrust mindlessly into the other's tight ass.

L screamed cumming suddenly. His back arching up the desk his eyes rolling back and a string of drool running out of the side of his mouth. The sight of L convulsing and moaning without an ounce of shame sent Light over the edge soon after. He took his hand from L's throat and held L's hips in a vice grip, spilling his hot seed into the other's still writhing body.

''Fuck!'' Light shouts as a sudden spasm from L intensifies his orgasm. Light collapses on top of the other. He sighs as L runs his fingers through his hair soothingly. Light can't remember the last time he's had such an intense orgasm. After spending a few moments in each other's arms Light is alerted by his phone ringing.

The caller ID read Lawleit.

Hmmm, that's weird...

Light answered the phone,''Hello?''

''Where are you Light? I need you to fax some documents for me.'' L's monotone came from the other side of the phone.

Light's breath hitches. He looks down at the debauched ''L'' and wonders who the hell did he just fuck.


	2. Chapter 2

''Is something the matter Light? Are you alright? Are you in danger?'' L asks on the other end of the line.

Light can't bring himself to answer as L's clone gives him a very devious yet coy look as he sat up. The drying semen on his belly making the action look purely obscene.

Who was this weirdo? Light knew that something had been off but didn't expect something like this to happen. How did this person manage to sound and look exactly like his husband? The phone slid from Light's hand crashing to the floor.

L was sounding worried,''Light! What was that? Are you okay?''

Light gulped and looked at the man that looked exactly like his husband and nearly every way. The man had a little pouch on his stomach but not enough to make Light suspicious. The harder Light looked the more he realized that the other man was wearing eyeliner. Light backed up hastily fixing his appearance.

''LIGHT!'' Light heard his husband yelling for him over the phone but couldn't bring himself to answer. He picked up the phone and hung up on his husband out of shame. He just had one of the best orgasms of his life with someone that was not his husband.

Light felt rage pool in his stomach,''Who the fuck are you!?''

''I am B. Nice to meet you Light Yagami...I have to say, that was one hell of a greeting...Your files hardly live up to your true potential...I see why L brags about you so much...''

''Brags about me?'' Light asks nervously.

''Yes...L brags about you to Mello none stop about how intelligent and thoughtful you are even though you lack empathy sometimes you try your best and blah blah blah...I wanted to see what all the fuss was about and you definitely didn't disappoint. You're just as sexy as your picture too...''

''Slow down! Who are you and how do you know all of us?''

''I grew up with L...he was my best friend in the orphanage...I was so jealous that he was getting married to this nice looking, Atheltic, and vastly intelligent stud so I decided to get a taste of you myself...I pride myself on being an aggressive top but I'll be an aggressive bottom anytime for you Light-kun...''

Light growled before punching B square in the face,''Fucking pervert!''

B recovered quickly before leaning in grinning,''Might wanna leave...the task force will be here soon...the entire task force including your father...you wouldn't want them to find you in this situation would you?''

Light growled knowing that the other was right,''This isn't over! You better not have given me an STD!''

''Of course not Light-kun...that was my first time.''

Light was skeptical about the validity of the statement but let it go nonetheless.

Light ran to a nearby park and sat down to catch his breath. It was 10 minutes before L walked up to him and said,''Did you not hear me calling your name?''

''No.'' Light answered his voice lifeless. He avoided L's eyes. L looked him up and down and Light knew that his husband knew how he looked when he was spent. He worked hard to avoid his husband's gaze,''Um...well I'm safe and sound so you can go now...''

''Are you wired?'' L asks straddling him. Getting dangerously close to his face. Light hurriedly looked everywhere but his husband.

L was sniffing him and it made his back go stiff. He didn't want to talk to his husband about what had just taken place. How do you explain something like this?

Uh hey, honey...I just fucked your twin in a very public place thinking he was you...

L wouldn't stop sniffing so Light pushed him back. L's nonexistent eyebrow was arched at him,''What exactly were you doing in there Light?''

''N-Nothing...Um... I thought that there would be a show playing but nope. No show...'' Light says nervously standing up hoping to knock his husband from his lap but instead, the other man clung to him like a monkey.

''Why so nervous Light-kun?'' L questioned looking a little peeved.

''Um...could you let me go now?'' Light says still avoiding his gaze.

''No. Look me in the eyes. Look at me Light!'' L commanded gripping him.

''get off of me first...'' Light says softly.

L climbs down and stands with his back straight, a rare sight to see. Light looks him in the eyes and L simply stares back coldly. His expression unreadable. Light starts to waver as L glares back at him not blinking once.

''Um...so...'' Light starts.

''What were you doing there Light?'' L asks again.

Light's eyes dart around the park for a distraction to avert his husband's attention. Light starts to slowly walk away,''I was just enjoying the scenery...and trying to watch a play...'' The way his husband's eyes followed him suspiciously told Light that he knew better but Light had too much pride to admit his mistake. It greatly hurt his pride to admit to such a stupid mistake so he instead slowly slid away from his husband's cold glare.

''Who did you go with?'' L asks his tone emotionless.

''Myself...'' Light lied looking his husband in the eyes to try to prove that he was telling the truth.

''Mmmhm...'' L said,''According to my calculations you only self-gratify 30% of the time. You have a higher than average libido that contrasts with my near-nonexistent one. Since you are far from an exhibitionist I could not possibly see you masturbating in a public space because how others view you matters far too much to you. So that moves the 30% down to a 15% chance of you even thinking of doing such a thing. Plus why would you leave the house to do it when you do it while sitting next to me sometimes when I am busy on the computer? You have never been coy about such things. The chances of you lying right now are a staunch 99.98% in other words you are only making things harder on yourself by underestimating my detective abilities.''

Light felt a bead of sweat slide down his face.

''However, the chances of you cheating on me are 23% though I do admit that a little of my own bias towards myself may play a factor in that number. When we first started dating I felt that your chances of cheating were a strong 99%. You have proven to me over time that I was over thinking things. I need further evidence to prove that you have indeed cheated on me so I can not say anything definitively but I would like for you to admit to these offenses before I start to investigate this situation further.''

Light was shocked at how level-headed his husband was being about this whole situation. He gulped before asking,''Why 23 percent?''

''I see your wandering eyes...looks of yearning aimed other people...it does not necessarily upset me because it is natural to admire others but your lust sometimes extends to more than just admiring. Sometimes you follow them on social media and like all of their pictures or send them messages...that is why it is 23 percent...you have a high and yet low chance of running off but after this incident, you are at a 50 percent chance of cheating and or leaving me.'' L said his voice flat but sounding vaguely depressed.

Light gulped and tried to find out a way to word what had happened to him without sounding like a nutcase that was making crap up to get out of trouble with his significant other. L had never spoken of a twin. It probably was just some sick individual who was obsessed with L. Maybe he should tell L so that they could get the sick fuck locked up.

Light's eyes darted around as he tried to form the word. L was watching with stark interest. As soon as Light opened his mouth L's phone rung.

L answered and said,''Hello Mello...''

L's eyes widened and his jaw went slack,''Really? How? I thought he was in a padded cell in America? How did he get here? I will look into capturing him as soon as possible!'' Light slammed his phone closed before walking away.

Light followed and asked,''What is it?''

''My stalker is in town...''

''Stalker?'' Light questioned his intuition telling him that he knew exactly who L was talking about Light asked,''Does he look a lot like you?''

''Why? Have you seen him?'' L asks eye widening.

''I might have?''


	3. Chapter 3

L stopped walking,''What did he look like when you saw him?''

''Um...your height, Black hair, White shirt, jeans, black eyeliner, um a deep voice like yours, slouched posture like you...'' as Light listed things off L looked as if he was digesting the information.

''If you knew all of this why didn't you tell me immediately?'' L asks.

''Um...this is going to sound really stupid...but I thought he was you...his impression was spot on...'' Light answers sheepishly.

''Wait...you spoke to him? What did he say to you?'' L questioned leaning in a little too close.

Light's eyes darted around and he backed away a little bit.

L leaned in closer,''What did he say Light?''

''Nothing safe for work...'' Light mumbled.

''So he threated you with death?'' L said looking intrigued.

Light slid away from his husband,''Don't want to talk about it.''

''I need to know! This is important evidence!'' L argued sounding frustrated.

''Just give me time!'' Light yelled.

''Time for what? We do not have time! A lunatic is out on the loose!'' L argued back his tone harsh.

Light shook his head and walked to his car. L followed close behind,''Where are you going?''

''Somewhere.''

''Why?'' L asks suspiciously.

''Need to talk to Mello about something...'' Light says getting in the car.

''I know more than Mello will ever know! I knew B before Mello was even born!''

''Who's B?'' Light asks confused.

L facepalms,''He is my impersonator.''

''I will be back to speak to you more about that. I just have business with Mello now...'' Light answers bluntly.

''Why? Since when? You are acting out of character and it is deeply disturbing...are you sure that B does not have you wired?''

''I am sure...'' Light answers.

''Then why go to Mello? Why not call him?''

''I need to speak with him face to face.''

''Well if that is the case I will join you,'' L says and tries to get into the passenger's seat but Light has locked all the doors. L cocks his head at his husband,''Hm...I see that you really don't want me to see what you're up to...''

''I am not 'up to' anything. I will be back to speak to you. Bye!'' Light yells before pulling off before L can answer. L clenches his fist at his side as he watches his suspicious husband drive off.

LXLXLXXLXLXLXXLXLXLXLXXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXXLXLXLXXLXLXLXLXLXXLLXXLXLXLXLXLXXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXLXXLXLXL

''Hey...'' Light says nervously as he sits on a couch across from Mello.

''Hey...'' Mello says awkwardly looking him up and down.

Light sighs,''What if I told you I met B today?''

''I would ask why didn't you notify us immediately?'' Mello questioned.

''I thought he was L...'' Light mumbled.

''I could see that...B has gotten quite good at impersonating L. He's a lunatic. Why are you telling me this? Do you have any leads?''

''Well...no...''

''Then why are you here...''

''I kind of slept with B and I don't know how to tell L...'' Light says nervously.

Mello blinks a few times his face blank before he bursts into loud roaring laughter. Light hides his face in shame as Mello points and laughs at him.

Matt comes out of his game room and asks,''What the hell is going on Mello?''

Light wanted to disappear through the floor.

Mello worked hard to catch his breath before he wheezed out,''Light fucked B thinking he was L!''

Matt's face lit up, he jumped on the couch next to Mello,''Word!? Was it good?''

Mello started laughing even harder,''Stop! Fucking stop! My sides can't take it!''

Light blushes and answers coyly,''Yes.''

Mello wheezes and Matt gives him a thumbs up before saying,''You know B is a freak...I heard he's into some kinky shit...I bet you two had fun.''

''Shut the fuck up Matt!'' Mello wheezed out. He sounded like a man on his deathbed.

Matt chuckled a few times too before saying,''In Light's defense at least he got a lead on him and a nut busted.''

Mello rolled off the couch crying.

Light could tell that his ears were candy red. Well, so much for his pride.

To Light's horror, the door unlocked and in walked his beloved husband. He looked peeved with his hands in his pockets. he sat on the couch opposite from Mello and Matt. He looked annoyed that Light was sitting there as well so he scooted to the furthest end of it.

Light asks,''You have a key?''

''Of course...I was in the neighborhood and decided to stop by...I heard all of the laughter and decided to invite myself in.''

Mello fixed himself up and sat back on the couch snickering and giving Light amused glances every so often. Light gave him a look that read,'How do I tell him?'

Mello answered aloud,''Just tell him.'' His face serious.

''Tell me what?'' L asks curiously.

''Um...well...I thought that B was you and we had sex...'' Light says softly.

''Hmmm...'' was all L said for a while before he asked,''Any leads on his destination?''

Light blinked. Did his husband hear anything he just said?

''Nope. It's as if he disappeared from the face of the earth, but I have an idea. What if we use Light as a decoy for B to show himself again...since Light was able to get B to show himself I feel that he can do it once more!'' Mello says looking amused at the other two.

L curls in on himself looking down at the coffee table and Light was looking at everything but his husband.

From L's curled up position he mumbles,''This plan could indeed work...''

Mello looked at L sympathetically,''L it's just for work. Nothing more...''

L nods eyes downcasted,''Yes... I know...Since this is just work you are permitted to only flirt with B. Kissing, groping, and sex will not be tolerated Light.''

''Okay.'' Light awkwardly says.


	4. Chapter 4

Light was busy getting ready for a date with B. He primped his hair and even put on a little makeup. L leaned against the wall of the bathroom,''Is all of this entirely necessary? This is a set up after all...''

''Well I have to look believable...''Light says distracted by the task of cleaning up his eyebrows a little bit.

L huffs,''Are you wearing that? Why is the shirt so tight? Why are is it practically hanging open?''

''Just trying to look good for the fake date babe.'' Light sighs.

''Why? It's just B. No one special.'' L said his voice flat.

''Babe...could you please...'' Light sighs getting annoyed.

''Could I please what?'' L asks cocking his head.

''Leave me alone, please. Just go sit down.''

''I beg your pardon...'' L grunts. He didn't move a single muscle. Just stood there staring at his husband with owlish eyes,''Light are you wearing lipstick?''

''Honey...please...'' Light sighs out.

''You like him. If my calculations are correct you are enamored with that idiot. There is no need to primp for as long as you have Light.'' L sighs out.

Light sighs and touches up his hair. Right when Light finally gets his hair looking the way he wants it to L comes over and messes up the style by ruffling it in every direction. A slight scowl on his face. His lip curling in disgust.

''Fuck-L! Stop!'' Light yells. L continues to scowl at him and does it again. Light grips his wrist to stop him and pushes him backward.

L pushes him harder rubbing the lip gloss from his husband's lips, his movements far too harsh.

''Damn it L!'' Light struggles to get his husband off of his face. He pushes his husband toward the door once more to stop him from ruining anything else. L attaches himself to Light's shirt,''Button this up.''

''No!'' Light yells definitely.

The two struggle for dominance before L yanks his arm back harder than necessary. The room is filled with the sound of fabric ripping at the seams,''Oops.'' L said unapologetically,''Looks like you'll need to wear a more modest outfit now.''

Light growled,''Do you not know how much this shirt fucking costs!?'' He pushes his husband back harshly. L answers by ripping the shirt the rest of the way off. Light screams indignantly before pushing L so hard that he falls onto the floor. L answers by sweeping his leg under the other man, causing him to land in the bathtub.

''Hey! Hey! Hey! What the hell is going on here!?'' Mello yells from the doorway.

''I was getting ready for the date and L decided to not only fuck up my makeup but my EXPENSIVE clothes as well...'' Light grunted from the tub.

''Aww L.'' Mello sighs sympathetically,''C'mon. Let's find you something else to do.''

L shrugged away Mello's hands,''I want to work on this case!''

''L you can't work on a case that you keep sabotaging! If you don't like the case just admit it. You don't have to do this L.'' Mello says softly.

''I'm not sabotaging anything.'' L's tone was biting.

Mello sighs,''C'mon Light. I'll get you a new dress shirt.''

Light got out of the tub and felt his heart clench at his husband sitting in his normal squat. His hair was hiding his eyes and he was worrying his thumb between his teeth. He looked anxious and depressed. Light sighs and pulled his husband against his chest. L made a small sound of surprise.

''We don't have very much time guys! Holy shit L really did fuck up your hair Light.'' Mello says snickering.

''Give us a moment Mello. I will get ready soon.'' Light says before turning his atention to L,''What was all of that about?''

L refuses to look at him,''I am fine Light. Everything is fine. I just don't feel that all of this is truly nescarry. Why dress to impress? Why not just go in your everyday clothes?''

''Because it's a date baby...'' Light answers softly.

''You never did all of that for one of our dates. Is that because I am not worth impressing?'' L asks looking Light in the eye.

Light looks taken aback,''You know that's not true! You are amazing! I just have a much closer bond with you. A bond beyond the superficial. Plus when we got married I was dressed to the nines for you!''

''Yes. You were...'' L admits.

''This is all just for the case baby.'' Light says smiling.

''Hm.'' L answers in reply looking away from the other. Light kisses his cheek before leaving to get ready again.

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Light put on a more modest dress shirt to appease his irritated husband. He and B were scheduled to meet in a very upscale restaurant. They reserved the entire place for the night. Light felt very nervous about practically being left alone with the lunatic again.

To his surprise B was wearing slacks and a red dress shirt lined with gold. He wasn't wearing as much eyeliner, he wore just enough to give him a cat eye. His lips looked soft and plump with a thin gloss covering them.

What shocked Light is how beautiful L's hair could look if he actually combed it more than once a week. B's hair was silky and fanned out slightly at the ends. His bangs were swooped over his right eye. It really complimented his features. Light was in awe of how sexy his husband could look even though this wasn't his husband and he had to fight to remind himself that.

Light gulped as B walked up to the table he was sitting at.

''You trying to catch flies there?'' B says playfully. Light for the life of him couldn't figure out what he was talking about. He had forgotten all about the earpiece in his ear so when he heard his husband all but yell his name he nearly jumped out of his skin.

B chuckled and sat down across of Light,''Aww you're so cute Light...you didn't have to dress up so much for little ol' me...''

Light gulped and struggled to find the appropriate words,''T-Thank you...you look...good...''

He heard his husband scoff into the earpiece. Maybe that wasn't the best thing to say?

''Thank you, darling,'' B says batting his lashes.

L grunted,''While the two of you are eating get him to talk a little bit about his motives...he is probably very suspicious of us already but since I have set cameras in every corner of this restaurant I can judge his movements and facial expressions. Just try to get him to say anything incriminating...Knowing him he'll slip if he's distracted enough.''

Light took note of that.

B says,''Soooo...what made you ask me out again? Was the sex that good?''

''What do you think?'' Light flirted back.

''Is that so? What would L think about you asking me out for a round two?'' B questions.

''Um...well what he doesn't know won't hurt him right?'' Light says smirking.

''I heard through the grapevine that you were devious but I didn't know how far you were willing to go...Why did you marry him if you're just going to cheat on him?'' B asks curiously.

''I love him...but he fails to satisfy me sexually.'' Light answers placing his hand on B's.

Light ignored the childish huff in his earpiece.

''Why don't you just leave him for me? I see how you look at me...I certainly clean up better than that fool. He's a living zombie...'' B chuckles before seductively leaning over,''Unlike me...''

Light shrinks back feeling shame at the idea of kissing another man in front of his husband.

As if reading his mind L grunts bitterly,''Go ahead, you've already gone this far. Why go back now? What more is a kiss?''

''C'mon...give us a kiss...'' B moans leaning in further.

Light blushes and pecks him chastely before leaning back again.

B laughs loudly and shakes his head,''You can't be serious Light? After all of the sinful things you, did with your tongue that's all you give me?'' B pulls Light up to him by the back of his head and presses his lips against the other man's. The kiss started off passionate but ended up getting down right sinful. B held back nothing. Light felt his lower region slowly churn to life.

Luckily he was saved by the waiter coming out and placing water on he table He asks what they want. B ordered without taking his eyes off of Light.

Light sheepishly ordered his food avoiding B's eyes.

B tsked,''You're feeling guilty...''

''I-yeah...I'm sorry...'' Light answers softly.

''Do NOT think about him when you are in my presence! Got it!'' B yelled suddenly.

Light flinched slightly at the intense mood whiplash. All he could do was nod.

''L this! L that! Everything is always about him! The greatest detective in all the fucking world! Ugh!'' B growled.

''Is that why you're with me?'' Light asked.

''What do you mean?'' B asks.

''So that you can take something away...'' Light says softly.

''You could say that...'' B says softly,''He can stand to lose something...Tinder has been a bust for me lately...You'd think it'd be easier for a guy that swings both ways to get laid...but I guess not haha...''

''So your next course of action was to get with a married man...'' Light says softly.

''Not just any married man...Light Yagami...My rivals beloved, perfect, sexy, and intelligent husband that can do no wrong! Oh, that bastard brags about you so much! My husband bought me this for Christmas! Look at what my husband sent me! My husband is always there for me! My husband is intelligent enough to aid in my hardest cases! Ugh! I get tired of hearing that braggy bullshit...I will give him this though...you are a beast in bed...you fucked my brains out...totally worth the trickery honestly.''

Light rolled his eyes at the crude man before asking,''So what is your motive for all of this?''

''Wanted to take something that L has all for myself...'' B says shrugging.

''That's it?'' Light asks skeptically.

B looks bored,''Uh yeah...there is no great master plan going on...not about to plant a bomb or eat children...just wanted to get back at L for all the times he rubbed being married in my face. Oh speaking of L. Hiya!'' He looks directly at one of the cameras and waves at it.

Light facepalms feeling stupid. Of course, B knew about being watched. He was from the Whammy house after all.

Light lifts his head when the once locked restaurant door opens to reveal his seething husband. To say that L flew over the table to kick B in the face would be an understatement. Light made no move to stop his husband because he knew when L was pissed there was no stopping him.

Light winced watching the beatdown his husband put on B. It was almost comical if L wasn't stomping the shit out of him. After B fell unconscious Light pulled L off of him.

This. This was why no one fucked with L.


	5. Chapter 5

On the way home L was on the furthest side of the limo from him. Light respected that and kept his distance.

When they got into the house L went straight to the pantry to get his cakes before sitting down on the couch. Light went to take a shower. When he returned L was still sitting on the couch staring into space.

Light eases up to him and hugs him.

L leans into the hug,''Tell me Light...is it true that I fail to please you?''

''I was just playing a part L-

''No more excuses! Are you displeased with me sexually?'' L asked his tone sharp.

''Well sometimes...yes...''Light answers softly.

''Why?'' L asks softly.

''Well I have a high libido and you have a low one is all...'' Light answers softly.

''Is B more appealing to you simply because he is a sentient glory hole?'' L asks bitterly.

''He is not more appealing to me!'' Light huffs out annoyed.

''Then what was all of that slack-jawed starry-eyed nonsense earlier?'' L hisses.

Light sighs,''You're something else when you're insecure...''

''I am not insecure! I am never insecure! I am a genius and the greatest detective in the world. I have a secure and stable home along with income. What is it I have to be insecure over?''

''I don't know. You tell me.'' Light sighs.

L pouts,''He's a waste of my time.''

''Then stop wasting time thinking about him.'' Light countered his voice flat.

L clicked his tongue and continued to stare into space. Light sighs and pulls L into his lap,''C'mon L let's cuddle...there's no need to be jealous because I am here always. I will never leave you...''

L scoffed,''That is the least of my concern.''

''I love you more than words can say...''Light whispers.

L doesn't answer, he simply leans into Light's embrace.

''It's okay if my lack of sex drive repels you. I want nothing but for you to be happy Light...If you don't want me, that is perfectly understandable...I have never desired a relationship until I met you...I do enjoy the act of sex but I do not find it necessary to have a loving marriage...''

''I understand...I am fine with cuddles only...'' Light says smiling.

''Then why did you tell B that you weren't?'' L countered.

''I-I...Sometimes just cuddling with you gives me blue balls but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world...'' Light says shrugging.

L rolls his eyes,''I appreciate your crude honesty.''

''You're very sexy L, you're gorgeous...sometimes it's hard for me to not get hard. Give a guy a break...''

''You don't have to lie...'' L mumbled.

''When will you believe me? You are amazing L...in every way...''

''No. You.'' L mumbles not looking at him.

Light chuckles and cuddles the other man closer. The two cuddle in silence until sleep takes them over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I have some more Death Note fics that will be published one of these days, I feel bad because I have so many stories on hiatus but I'm writing for other fandoms. I get writer's block but only in specific fandoms...Idk why that is. I have been writing nothing but Death Note and Jojo fics lately.


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